{"id":1010,"date":"2017-11-14T16:23:48","date_gmt":"2017-11-14T16:23:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/?p=1010"},"modified":"2018-06-04T22:53:09","modified_gmt":"2018-06-04T22:53:09","slug":"should-you-settle","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/should-you-settle\/","title":{"rendered":"Should You Settle?"},"content":{"rendered":"

By James Bauer<\/em>
\nAuthor of The Secret Love Instinct<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

What If You Knew What Men Secretly Wanted, but They Could Never Tell You… Don’t Forget To Check Out\u00a0<\/strong><\/em>T<\/em>he Secret Love Instinct<\/a><\/em><\/strong><\/h3>\n

Should You Settle?<\/h2>\n

\u201cShould I hold out for something better?<\/p>\n

Or should I settle for what I\u2019ve got?\u201d<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve heard that question so many times. Mostly from women who are just starting relationships, but sometimes I hear it from women who are about to walk down the aisle.<\/p>\n

For those women, asking that question takes great courage. It opens up the possibility of disrupting their entire life. And yet they can\u2019t live without knowing:<\/p>\n

Is this guy the best I\u2019m going to get? Or is there someone else out there for me?<\/p>\n

It\u2019s an honest question. You want to know you got the best deal possible, so to speak.<\/p>\n

Maybe this guy isn\u2019t your soulmate. Maybe, if you\u2019d just waited another year or tried online dating one more time, you\u2019d have found your real soulmate. The one who\u2019s exactly like you in all the ways that matter. The one who doesn\u2019t pick his nose or ignore you when the game is on. The one who sweeps you off your feet.<\/p>\n

Other women have boyfriends like that. You can tell by their smile, like a cat that\u2019s got the cream. You just know they get treated like a queen.<\/p>\n

Why doesn\u2019t your guy treat you like that?<\/p>\n

Is it time to trade up?<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s find out.<\/p>\n

Here are the 4 questions I would ask.<\/strong><\/p>\n

1. How committed is your relationship?<\/strong><\/h3>\n

If you start to have second thoughts when you\u2019re dating someone, then pay attention to what your intuition is telling you. When doubts are there from the beginning, they\u2019re a sign that something isn\u2019t quite right.<\/p>\n

However, if you\u2019re married or in a long-term committed relationship, then those second thoughts aren\u2019t anything to be scared of. They\u2019re bringing you a message. Your relationship needs more tender loving care.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s challenging to live with one person for the rest of your life. You see all his flaws and imperfections, and he sees yours. Of course you\u2019re going to wonder if some mythical Prince Charming exists. It\u2019s appealing to imagine a life where you waltz through every day in perfect harmony with the love of your life.<\/p>\n

In real life, we\u2019re flawed and imperfect. We hurt each other accidentally. We\u2019re not always as careful with one another\u2019s feelings as we could be.<\/p>\n

Instead of fantasizing about Prince Charming, deal with those difficult feelings. Wade through the mud with him. What\u2019s missing from your relationship? What aren\u2019t you telling one another? What aren\u2019t you admitting to yourself? How can you support each other better?<\/p>\n

It\u2019s better to have an imperfect relationship where you can talk, than a seemingly perfect relationship where you\u2019re not allowed to mention the tough stuff.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s the next question you should be asking\u2026<\/p>\n

2.<\/strong> Is there a foundation of mutual respect, honesty, and trust?<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Some things have to be there. You can\u2019t have a relationship without them.<\/p>\n

Mutual respect, honesty, and trust are non-negotiable. You should never have to settle for a man who doesn\u2019t respect you. You should never settle for a man you can\u2019t trust.<\/p>\n

Respectful, honest, trustworthy men aren\u2019t always exciting. But if you want a long-term relationship, you want someone you can lean on. Someone solid. Someone who\u2019s not going to run or deflect responsibility when the going gets tough.<\/p>\n

3. Can you be yourself?<\/strong><\/h3>\n

It\u2019s not an honest relationship when you can\u2019t be yourself.<\/p>\n

So many people make compromises in order to have a relationship. Maybe you pretend you don\u2019t really want to have children right away, or that you\u2019re okay with him not calling you. You don\u2019t want to seem needy or scare him off.<\/p>\n

If you sense that he wouldn\u2019t want to be with you if he knew the \u201ctruth\u201d about you, then you\u2019re shortchanging yourself. Give him the chance to know what\u2019s in your heart, even if you think he might leave you.<\/p>\n

You\u2019ll never know if he loves you if you don\u2019t let him know who you are.<\/p>\n

4. Are you feeling pressured?<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Often, the women who worry most about settling are those who are feeling pressured.<\/p>\n

Maybe they\u2019re getting older, and they worry that this is their last chance to find love. Maybe they\u2019re feeling pressured to settle down. Maybe they just hate being single.<\/p>\n

Research shows that the more you fear being single, the more willing you are to settle for less in your relationships.<\/p>\n

Ask yourself:<\/p>\n

\u201cIf I had all the time in the world to settle down, if several other guys were interested in me right now, would I still choose this relationship?\u201d<\/p>\n

Your answer tells you everything you need to know.<\/p>\n

In the end, no one can tell you whether you should hold out for a better match. Listen to the part of you that knows, deep inside, whether you\u2019re settling for less or simply not putting in the work your relationship deserves.<\/p>\n

Hey, by the way, I have a Relationship Reboot<\/strong> program that will totally change your life. Many have benefited from it. All you need to do is use your Feminine Love Instinct<\/strong> to kickstart the whole process.<\/p>\n

Learn more here:<\/p>\n

Video: The #1 Trait Men Desire In A Woman<\/a> <\/strong><\/h3>\n

\"The<\/a><\/p>\n

Fair warning:<\/strong> once you do this, there’s no turning back. He’ll come at you with the energy and enthusiasm he had on your FIRST DATE<\/strong>!<\/p>\n

To your success in love and in life!<\/p>\n

Kind regards,<\/p>\n

James Bauer
\nRelationships Coach and Author<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By James Bauer Author of The Secret Love Instinct What If You Knew What Men Secretly Wanted, but They Could Never Tell You… Don’t Forget To Check Out\u00a0The Secret Love Instinct Should You Settle? \u201cShould…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1011,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[15,16],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1010"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1010"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1010\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1697,"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1010\/revisions\/1697"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1011"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1010"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1010"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.meetysweet.com\/women\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1010"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}