How much experience with women do you have -honestly?<\/p>\n
Have you had your share of girlfriends?\u00a0 Maybe\u00a0even been married before?\u00a0 Would you say that\u00a0there’s not much about women that surprises you\u00a0anymore?<\/p>\n
If you answered yes, then I want you to try and\u00a0think back a LOOOONG time ago, back to when you\u00a0had no CLUE about women.<\/p>\n
You know what I’m talking about: the days when\u00a0you used to watch dirty movies just to get an idea\u00a0of what it was all about, or the day you\u00a0discovered your dad’s stash of Victoria’s Secret\u00a0catalogues.<\/p>\n
You figured you were pretty smart\u00a0 until the day\u00a0you met an actual woman and realized that the\u00a0camera lens is pretty distorting.<\/p>\n
Now, we’ve got two readers here who are STILL\u00a0stuck at that stage of having no idea what being\u00a0with a woman is like.\u00a0 They’ve read enough,\u00a0watched enough, imagined enough, but they’re still\u00a0single and experience-less.<\/p>\n
What advice would YOU offer them?\u00a0 What do you\u00a0wish you knew THEN that you know NOW?<\/p>\n
We all have a duty to pass on tried-and-true\u00a0wisdom to those guys who are just starting out,\u00a0because, if you were anything like me, you\u00a0believed a lot of STUPID things that could have\u00a0been set right if you just had someone to ask.<\/p>\n
So whether you’ve had tons of experience with\u00a0women or not, check out what I have to say to\u00a0these two readers, and ask yourself the question:\u00a0is there anyone I know RIGHT NOW who could benefit\u00a0from some mentoring in this area?<\/p>\n
QUESTION #1: <\/strong><\/p>\n Hey man, just wanted to say thanks for all the\u00a0great advice and good work and all that, but hey I\u00a0was just wondering what advice you’d give to a guy\u00a0who has never even had a relationship before and\u00a0has no idea of even where to start.<\/em><\/p>\n <\/p>\n I’ve like kissed 2 girls in my life and I live\u00a0in a really old fashioned kind of place where\u00a0there are no bars or clubs and you can’t even\u00a0visit a girl at her house without her mom checking\u00a0up on her every 5 seconds.<\/p>\n I try to learn as much as I can so that I’m\u00a0ready for the real deal but I don’t think I’m ever\u00a0going to get to put it all into practice unless I\u00a0leave this hole and move somewhere else where I’m\u00a0the new guy and no one knows me.\u00a0 Do you have any\u00a0advice for me like should I try to meet older\u00a0women? <\/em><\/p>\n MY RESPONSE: <\/strong><\/p>\n Hey dude, thanks for writing.\u00a0 You know, not\u00a0having had a relationship before is nothing to be\u00a0ashamed about.\u00a0 Some guys have their first\u00a0girlfriend at 8, some at 16, and others at 22.\u00a0Basically, it happens when it’s right.<\/p>\n But you’re making one big mistake, and that is:\u00a0you’ve basically GIVEN UP.\u00a0 You’re pinning all\u00a0your hopes on leaving your hometown.\u00a0 Pinning your\u00a0hopes on the future is the best way of making sure\u00a0the present sucks.\u00a0 Personally, I’d rather live my\u00a0life NOW than wait for some imaginary future\u00a0utopia.<\/p>\n You should be practicing your seduction skills\u00a0right here, right now, right under the noses of\u00a0all those mothers checking up on their daughters.<\/p>\n But to do that, you’ve got to expand what you\u00a0think of as “seduction.”<\/p>\n Seduction starts way before the first kiss.\u00a0Seduction is basically a process of making a girl\u00a0so hot for you that she’ll find ways to sneak out\u00a0with you behind the bushes if she has to.\u00a0 Where\u00a0there’s a will, there’s a way.<\/p>\n When you seduce a girl, you can use verbal and non-verbal body language to communicate a strong\u00a0sexual presence WITHOUT needing to even touch her.<\/p>\n So work on those skills that you can practice\u00a0right now.\u00a0 Work on building up the confidence to\u00a0approach and talk to any girl.<\/p>\n Work on building up your conversational skills, like\u00a0storytelling, humor, and teasing.\u00a0 Work on developing\u00a0a powerful physical presence.\u00a0 Become that guy that\u00a0women desire.\u00a0 You don’t need bars or clubs for that.<\/p>\n You’ve got an advantage that most guys don’t,\u00a0and that is: you’re living in an “old fashioned\u00a0place” where – correct me if I’m wrong here – the\u00a0girls are probably CRAVING excitement and a taste\u00a0of danger!<\/p>\n If there are no bars and clubs, I’m betting that\u00a0there are a LOT of bored girls sitting around\u00a0waiting for someone exciting to come along.<\/p>\n That could be you, man.<\/p>\n All it takes is reframing your perspective.<\/p>\n REFRAMING is one of the most powerful mind\u00a0tools available to us.\u00a0 When you “reframe”\u00a0something, you put it in a new context that allows\u00a0you to see advantages and opportunities you never\u00a0saw before.<\/p>\n For example, for you, your hometown is an\u00a0old-fashioned “hole” where you can’t score.<\/p>\n But, for someone else, your hometown might be the\u00a0biggest jackpot of opportunity out there, because It’s all in the eye of the beholder, and my\u00a0advice to you would be to put on new glasses.<\/p>\n QUESTION #2: <\/strong><\/p>\n I’ve gone through every part of your course and\u00a0I’m really clear in my head about who I am and\u00a0what I want, but the thing is that right now I’d\u00a0just settle for anything because I’m sick and\u00a0tired of being the “friend.”<\/em><\/p>\n <\/p>\n I started online dating three months ago, and\u00a0every single time I liked a girl we ended up being\u00a0friends.<\/p>\n This isn’t a new thing, because back as\u00a0far as I can remember I’ve always ended up being\u00a0friends with the girls I really liked, and the one\u00a0time I told a girl how I really felt about her she\u00a0was really nice about it then didn’t write me\u00a0back.<\/p>\n The upshot is that I’ve never had a girlfriend,\u00a0which I know is like admitting I’m a midget or\u00a0some kind of freak.\u00a0 I’m sick and tired of it and\u00a0I want to change but damned if I know how. <\/em><\/p>\n MY RESPONSE: <\/strong><\/p>\n Thanks for your letter, buddy.\u00a0 That’s great\u00a0that you’ve gone through the course diligently,\u00a0because it shows that you’re committed to learning\u00a0everything you can about women.<\/p>\n A lot of guys just focus on learning ONE thing,\u00a0because they think that THAT is what’s holding\u00a0them back, but they don’t realize that all aspects\u00a0of their life work together as part of one\u00a0integrated whole.<\/p>\n If, for example, a guy thinks that his problem\u00a0is running out of things to say – so he completely\u00a0skips over the section on identity – he’ll totally\u00a0miss out on the point that someone who’s fully\u00a0developed their identity will naturally have more\u00a0interesting things to say!<\/p>\n From your letter, though, I think there’s a\u00a0pretty obvious pattern going on.\u00a0 Something in the\u00a0way you’re relating to women automatically pegs\u00a0you as “friend.”<\/p>\n And it seems to be a pretty immediate thing: if girls\u00a0you’re meeting for the first time offline are putting\u00a0you in the “just friends” category, then you’re giving\u00a0off that vibe from the very beginning.<\/p>\n My suggestion to you would be to: Here’s what I mean.<\/p>\n 1.\u00a0 Get over your obsession with just being What I mean here is that obviously you’re\u00a0saying yes to being friends with all these women!<\/p>\n If a woman tells you, “Let’s just be friends,”<\/em> tell\u00a0her, “Thanks, but I’m more interested in meeting a\u00a0romantic partner at this point in my life than\u00a0having more friends.\u00a0 Good luck!”<\/em><\/p>\n Or, for that matter, just agree and then don’t\u00a0contact her again.\u00a0 Whatever works for you.<\/p>\n Don’t keep making friends with more and more\u00a0women.\u00a0 Got me?\u00a0 The reason is that you’re\u00a0TRAINING YOURSELF to become friends with women.<\/p>\n The more female friends you make, the more you’re\u00a0going to see yourself as the type of guy who ends\u00a0up with a dozen female friends but zero female\u00a0lovers.<\/p>\n I know it’s going to feel weird letting women\u00a0down when they say, “Let’s just be friends,” but\u00a0trust me: if they’re saying that, they could\u00a0really care less whether you stay friends or not.<\/p>\n Don’t clutter up your life with a lot of women who\u00a0aren’t going to enrich your life much anyway.<\/p>\n 2.\u00a0 Get over your self-judgment. <\/strong><\/p>\n This is a big one, sorry to say.\u00a0 I don’t\u00a0really care whether you’ve slept with 100 girls,\u00a010 girls, or 0 girls.\u00a0 It shouldn’t matter to you,\u00a0either.\u00a0 Get over your lack of experience, because\u00a0that’s messing up your head.<\/p>\n The minute you start judging yourself for some\u00a0perceived lack is the minute that your\u00a0shortcomings become a real issue in your life.<\/p>\n Look, some guys out there are majorly short, but\u00a0because they don’t look down on themselves as\u00a0“midgets” (Sean Stephenson, anyone?), they don’t\u00a0find their height to be an issue.<\/p>\n Right now, your lack of experience has become a\u00a0major issue for you, but YOU’VE made it that way.<\/p>\n Take responsibility, and get over it.<\/p>\n I’ve met a LOT of guys who can’t get past the\u00a0friends zone with girls.\u00a0 And you know what?\u00a0 9\u00a0out of 10 times, it’s because these guys think the\u00a0way to get closer to a girl is act more like a\u00a0girl.<\/p>\n It’s weird, and I don’t really get it, but I\u00a0suppose for some guys it makes sense.\u00a0 If you\u00a0don’t have anything to talk about with girls, it\u00a0makes sense to brush up on your celebrity gossip,\u00a0recognition of clothing labels, and familiarity\u00a0with face creams.<\/p>\n But really … is that making yourself into an\u00a0attractive guy, or is that just making yourself\u00a0into her best male friend?<\/p>\n Now, I’m not saying that I personally know what\u00a0the definition of manhood is.\u00a0 It’s something that\u00a0every guy really develops for himself.<\/p>\n But I’d recommend reading a couple of the\u00a0really good books out there discussing what being\u00a0a man is all about.\u00a0 You’ve heard me recommend\u00a0David Deida’s “The Way of the Superior Man.” <\/em>Another good one is Steve Biddulph’s “Manhood.” <\/em><\/p>\n And take it from me: if you’ve made the\u00a0commitment and purchased some of my stuff,\u00a0you’re probably not far off your goal.<\/p>\n Your biggest challenge is going to be breaking\u00a0the habits that you’ve built up over time and\u00a0really relaxing into the identity that you’ve\u00a0developed through my Make Her Crave You\u00a0course.<\/p>\n
\n(1) there’s not much competition,
\n(2) women are gagging for some excitement, and
\n(3) there’s not much else to distract them.<\/p>\n
\n(1) get over your obsession with being “friends” with
\nwomen,
\n(2) get over your self-judgment, ’cause you’re NOT
\na midget or freak, and
\n(3) start studying what it means to be a MAN.<\/p>\n
\nfriends. <\/strong><\/p>\n
\n3.\u00a0 Study what it means to be a MAN. <\/strong><\/p>\n